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Do these comments make you want to throw up? Of course, and what’s worse, they’re real! These bratty statements are actual quotes from the latest MTV reality stars: girls and boys whose super-rich and apparently super-tactless parents give the little darlings anything they desire for their sweet sixteen parties. Throwing elaborate televised bashes that cost upwards of $200,000 and indulging every whim of their prince or princess, the parents show who rules the household (the kids) and what really matters (getting your fifteen minutes however you can, in this case, by buying it). What a great life lesson: If you’ve got it, flaunt it, and it’s okay to trash people in your quest for pseudo-fame. These kids make Paris Hilton and Omarosa look like beacons of etiquette and accomplishment.

Sure, MTV’s newest reality show, My Super Sweet Sixteen, which premiered last January, is designed to be over the top and outrageous. That’s the whole point. It’s the reality TV equivalent of a bloody train wreck: You are appalled, but you just can’t avert your eyes. The kids are so obnoxious and so clueless as to how awful they sound, that you stay glued to your tube just to see what horrifyingly selfish thing they’ll say or do next.

Never seen the show? It centers around a spoiled teen or two, trailing them as they plan their sweet sixteen party, make outrageous, selfish demands, shed tears, throw tantrums, and torture their peers with lines like, “You’re not important enough to be invited.” Oh, and then there’s footage of the actual party, where the guest of honor may enter riding on a litter, behind the wheel of a luxury car, pulled by horses, or shuttled in a helicopter. The featured entertainment might be Kanye West, Ciara, Rihanna, or Diddy, the king of nouveau rich tasteless excess himself, to name a few. At the end of the night, the kids are presented with sweet sixteen gifts such as luxury vehicles (some get two!), jewelry and even homes. Their overindulgent, self-satisfied parents, portrayed to be every bit as awful as their kids—the truth, or the result of careful editing we don’t know—gloat in the background. I guess money can’t buy happiness, but it sure can by popularity.

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Sure, MTV’s newest reality show, My Super Sweet Sixteen, which premiered last January, is designed to be over the top and outrageous. That’s the whole point. It’s the reality TV equivalent of a bloody train wreck: You are appalled, but you just can’t avert your eyes. The kids are so obnoxious and so clueless as to how awful they sound, that you stay glued to your tube just to see what horrifyingly selfish thing they’ll say or do next.

Never seen the show? It centers around a spoiled teen or two, trailing them as they plan their sweet sixteen party, make outrageous, selfish demands, shed tears, throw tantrums, and torture their peers with lines like, “You’re not important enough to be invited.” Oh, and then there’s footage of the actual party, where the guest of honor may enter riding on a litter, behind the wheel of a luxury car, pulled by horses, or shuttled in a helicopter. The featured entertainment might be Kanye West, Ciara, Rihanna, or Diddy, the king of nouveau rich tasteless excess himself, to name a few. At the end of the night, the kids are presented with sweet sixteen gifts such as luxury vehicles (some get two!), jewelry and even homes. Their overindulgent, self-satisfied parents, portrayed to be every bit as awful as their kids—the truth, or the result of careful editing we don’t know—gloat in the background. I guess money can’t buy happiness, but it sure can by popularity.

Before you get too jealous of these pampered kids, consider how tough they have it, with their every whim catered to, their every foot-stamping demand met. As one teen put it, “Being rich is hard work!” Indeed.

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